My fiancé loves a boob shot or a full-frontal selfie – just not from me | The Sun

DEAR DEIDRE: THERE is nothing my fiance loves more than a  boob shot or a full-frontal selfie first thing in the morning. 

Unfortunately, I only know this because I stumbled across X-rated messages on his phone from another woman.

I am devastated but he insists I have nothing to worry about and says they never met up. 

I can’t understand why he would do this to me, and now I’m worried I’ll never be able to trust him again.

He is 32 and I’m 29. We’ve been together for three years and we’ve booked our wedding next summer.

One night when my fiancé was in the shower, his phone lit up with a message from a woman I’d never heard of before.

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I’m not one to snoop, but I couldn’t help myself. I had a feeling. 

My heart broke when I unlocked his phone to find hundreds of raunchy messages.

She had sent him explicit pictures and videos, and I saw him do things he’d never shown me. I couldn’t contain myself so I confronted him instantly.

He didn’t even try to defend himself and instead begged me for forgiveness. 

Apparently she slid into his DMs at a time when he was feeling sex­ually frustrated. 

And in truth, over the last few months our sex life has taken a hit, but naively I had been putting it down to us both being stressed at work and money ­pressures.

I never suspected  there could be more to it than I originally thought.

How can I marry someone that I don’t trust?


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DEIDRE SAYS: Your fiancé may not have had a physical affair, but he has betrayed your trust. 

Now he needs to work hard to convince you he is worthy of your faith.

Knowing you can rely on your partner is crucial for any relationship to work.

However, if he is truly sorry and you both want to make it work, then there is hope and trust can be rebuilt.

Don’t be afraid to postpone your wedding until you are 100 per cent confident in him again, or even cancel if you still have questions.

Talking to a counsellor together would really help you. 

Contact Tavistock Relationships (, 020 7380 1975) for couple’s counselling.

To help, I’m sending you my support pack Cheating – Can You Get Over It?

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