My boyfriend has avoided me after getting injured during energetic sex

DEAR DEIDRE: UNTIL recently, my boyfriend and I were having great sex. But being extra-energetic, he tore part of his penis.

Now sex has stopped and I feel like he isn’t interested in me any more.


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He looks at me with horror when I’m naked. I’m not sure what to do.

He’s 22 and I’m 21.

DEIDRE SAYS: It is likely to be a torn “banjo string” (the frenulum) which can be very painful. Your boyfriend might be worrying you are looking for sexual activity he does not feel ready for.

If you care for him, be understanding and patient. Assuming the tear is clean and free of infection, he doesn’t need to see a doctor.

But expect it to take a couple of weeks or so to heal. If it turns smelly, becomes more painful or is clearly infected, he should quickly seek medical help. When he is better, suggest he use a natural water-based lubricant in future to lessen the risk of tearing.

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