Looking after two babies under two has proved really hard and I can't cope

DEAR DEIDRE: I AM a mum of two babies under two and at times I find it so hard to cope with the crying and tantrums.

One will be two next month and the other is ten months. I find myself shouting at them but then I feel so guilty.

My boyfriend helps out a lot but he works shifts, so sometimes he’s on earlies or lates which doesn’t help at all. He is 26 and I am 24.

I worry I’m not the mum I thought I would be. Every other mum handles things better than I do. What is wrong with me?

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DEIDRE SAYS: You are just human and nothing is wrong with you. Any mum would struggle with two such little ones.

Some of those mums you know have meltdowns behind closed doors.

When you feel close to breaking point, rather than shout, make sure they are both safe – the baby in a cot, say, and the toddler in a secure room – turn your back and breathe deeply while you slowly count to ten.

It will bring the tension down all round. Home-Start helps struggling families (home-start.org.uk, 0800 068 6368).

NEXT IN TODAY'S DEAR DEIDRE I haven't seen my boyfriend in months and now I'm questioning my feelings for him

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