I worry for my granddaughter who lacks attention, how can I tell my daughter?

DEAR DEIDRE: MY granddaughter doesn’t get the attention she deserves at home and I worry that it’s making her angry and unhappy.

She is 13 and my daughter is 39.


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I’m 62.

Her parents split up when she was a baby and she hardly sees her dad.

She has an older brother who she fights with all the time as well as two half-sisters born when her mum remarried.

I feel stuck between my daughter, who I know shouldn’t take this abuse from her child, and my granddaughter, who desperately needs her mum’s love and attention.

My daughter works long hours and any time at home seems focused on the younger two.

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The eldest can go out to see his friends whenever he wants and my granddaughter gets left behind.

I think she feels like a nobody.

DEIDRE SAYS: Grandchildren do sometimes say things that cause real concern and it is tricky deciding what to do about it.

Real neglect shouldn’t be ignored. Your granddaughter depends on you for love and support.

Criticising or judging your daughter will only undermine her, so ask if she wants any advice. If not, don’t give it.

Focus on spending time with your granddaughter to show her she is valued and loved.

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