There are some milestones in relationships that are pretty obvious, like your first date, your first kiss, and when you finally make it official. Milestones can happen at any time, but one milestone that may not happen right away is traveling together. For those of you who aren’t sure if you’re ready to travel with your partner just yet, fret not. There are several things you’ll notice when you feel ready to take your relationship abroad.
One of the most important things to consider when trying to decide if you’re ready to travel together is if "you’ve spent more than a few days together, and you enjoy each other’s company," dating coach Diana Dorell tells Elite Daily. Dr. Benjamin Ritter, founder of Live for Yourself Consulting and The Breakup Supplement, agrees with Dorell. "Any time in a relationship can be the right time to travel with your partner, it might just lead to a more satisfying vacation if you actually enjoy each other’s company," he tells Elite Daily.
If the two of you aren’t at the point where you’ve spent hours or even days together at a time, that’s OK, but you may want to hold off a bit on traveling until you have spent those big chunks of time together. When you travel together, you’re going to be spending every minute of those days together, and it can be overwhelming if you and your partner haven’t been physically together for days at a time yet. However, that’s not the only thing to consider pre-travel that can help you decide if it’s time to take that step.
Psychiatrist and psychoanalyst Grant H. Brenner says that whether or not you’re ready to travel with your partner depends on two major factors. The first is what travel means to both you and bae. "If traveling is no big deal, then traveling right away is fine," he tells Elite Daily. "If, on the other hand, traveling is a huge thing, and how the trip goes will make or break the future of the relationship, they’re probably not ready." The second factor piggybacks on Dorell’s piece of advice. He says that how you get along is important to consider when you’re thinking about taking your relationship on a trip. If you and your partner have been arguing, "it isn’t likely to suddenly get better if you go on a trip where more is on the line," he explains.
"In either case, traveling is an opportunity to see how you get along in close quarters, how you plan things together, what activities overlap, and where compromise may be required, and so on," Brenner says. "If you get sick of each other fast, that can be a sign that the relationship has limited durability, so travel can be a test of that."
Wells Fargo surveyed 1,003 people in exclusive relationships and found that coupled millennials today consider traveling together a part of measuring the seriousness of a relationship. Out of the 1,003 people surveyed, 45 percent agreed that traveling together for the first time should happen within the first six months of dating. Two in five coupled millennials (42 percent) responded to the survey saying they believed a trip out of town meant their relationship was getting serious.
If you’re trying to decide whether it’s time for you and bae to take a trip together, it may be best to consider these factors before you take that step. But there is a happy medium between taking a long trip and staying put. "My suggestion would be to take a smaller, shorter trip first, such as a day trip, before taking a longer weekend or week trips out of town or on an airplane to visit family," Dorell says. By going out of town for the day, it allows you to spend hours together at a time and can help you see if you and bae are ready to travel together for a longer period of time.
So, once you’ve given traveling together some thought, there’s one more thing our experts suggest: "Clarify ahead of time what the vacation actually means," Dr. Ritter says. "Before you go on a vacation with your partner you should actually discuss your expectations for the relationship and the vacation. Every vacation should have a purpose. Is it to spend time alone together? Is it to share new experiences? Is it to relax? Is it to get to know each other’s friends more, or is becoming part of the family the goal?" Figuring out what the vacation actually means, if anything, can give you an idea of how your partner feels about your relationship. And if the relationship is still new and travling together wouldn’t mean much at this moment and time except just getting away together, enjoy it anyway! Take lots of pictures and just be together.
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