Best (and worst) drinking buddies
Give Melissa McCarthy and Richard E. Grant another round for Can You Ever Forgive Me?.
Cutest cupcakes
Tully: Minion-themed or not, she must’ve pulled an all-nighter to make these!
Top catchphrase
“Gucci!” From the coolest girl in the world, Kayla (Elsie Fisher) in Eighth Grade.
Best use of a ferris wheel
Simon and Bram’s long-awaited first kiss in Love, Simon.
Best use of a helicopter
Cher’s entrance in Mamma Mia! Here We Go Again. (Sorry, Mission: Impossible — Fallout!)
Best Tilda Swinton of Tilda Swinton’s three Suspiria roles
Blanc. Dr. Klemperer knows what happens to those who vote Markos.
Voice actor who sounds like what a dog would sound like if dogs talked
Bryan Cranston, Isle of Dogs.
Best voiceover, like, totally
Michael Peña as Luis is all, like, “Oh cool, I’m in Ant-Man & the Wasp.”
Best solo
Alex Honnold, the climber hanging on by his fingernails in Free Solo. (Sorry, Han!)
Best duo
Christian Bale and Amy Adams as Dick and Lynne Cheney in Vice. Practically Shakespearean.
Worst tribute
Madonna for Aretha at the VMAs. Madge honored the Queen of Soul by paying tribute to herself.
Best walker of the walk
Kenny Chesney, who donated all the proceeds of Songs for the Saints to hurricane victims in the islands.
Angriest album
Eminem’s Kamikaze. Slim Shady torches anyone who’s ever looked at him sideways on this surprise drop.
Most dramatic band beef
Fleetwood Mac. A split ends with a heartbreaker for guitarist Lindsey Buckingham.
Best 2000’s nostalgia
Anne-Marie. On “2002,” the singer throws us back to the double-denim era of Britney and *NSYNC.
Best use of features
Mariah Carey. On “Giving Me Life,” the diva invites Slick Rick and Blood Orange over for a vibe-y jam.
Biggest triple threat
Cody Fern as a sweet ex on Versace, Satan’s son on AHS, a snotty scion on HoC. Three roles, one tour de force year.
Triple threat
The Gifted’s Skyler Samuels gives three, well, gifted performances as the diverse (but identical) trio of Frost sisters.
Most ironically titled show
Life Sentence got 13 episodes. At least it lasted 11 hours longer than 2013’s Lucky 7.
Most dysfunctional family therapy session
Succession’s Roy family proved money can buy drama but not sanity.
Show that made us scared of a house
The Haunting of Hill House made our remodeling contractor nightmare seem quaint.
Show that made us scared of the White House
The Handmaid’s Tale just seems a little too prophetic in 2018.
Best use of a Hemsworth
The Good Place’s Larry Hemsworth (Ben Lawson) is fictional, but fits just fine in our Hems-bro dreams.
Worst use of a Hemsworth
Westworld, where the third Hemsworth, Luke, has had practically nothing to do…for two seasons.
Longest vacation
The Jersey Shore Family Vacation Part 2 cast GTL’d together in Las Vegas…and Seaside Heights…and Atlantic City.
Best use of an SNL star
Picture Stefon covering his mouth in captivated horror as he watched Bill Hader go next level on Barry.
Worst use of SNL stars
Remember anything about Colin Jost and Michael Che hosting the Emmys? (Besides the unrelated proposal.)
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