Romps with your boss and sleeping with an ex… here's what your sex dreams really mean

ARE your dreams dirty? If so, you are not alone. Sex is the number one theme in dreams, a survey has revealed.

A whopping one in six of us had erotic ones in the past month, according to a study from mattress firm Nectar Sleep.

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But what does it mean if your ex had a starring role or it involved getting saucy in exotic locations? Sexpert Kate Taylor, right, is here to decipher what your kinky sleep fantasies mean.

She says: “Sexy dreams can be a snapshot of how you are feeling at that moment in your life.  It can be a reflection of your anxieties and desires, but may well not be sexual at all.”

Here Kate takes ten of the most common sex dreams and decodes what the fantasies mean.

Dreaming about sex with your ex

This scenario could signify you haven’t had closure on a relationship. The type of sex you are having in the dream is important to the meaning.

If you dream about loving, romantic sex, you could be yearning for the relationship you feel you could have had with your ex, if outside issues hadn’t got in the way.

But if you dream of wild sex, you probably miss the fun you had together. Try to bring that into your everyday life or your current relationship.

It doesn’t always mean you are lusting for the person, but more the sex life you had together.

Having sex in a public place

If this is a recurring reverie, maybe you feel there is excitement missing in your sex life.

The thought that someone could catch you getting down and dirty gives an added element of passion — and it could be that you need to up the excitement in real life.

Romping with a co-worker or boss

This is very common, and you’re more likely to dream about bonking boring Barry from accounts than that sexy new temp, sadly.

If you’re getting it on with your boss in your dreams, you might be struggling with a power play in your own sexual relationship. Try telling your partner what you really want in the bedroom, and not just do what they expect of you.

If you are the boss in your dream, you might feel guilty that you are walking all over your lover in real life, so lighten up.

Having an orgy

Group sex expresses a need for more sharing in your love life.

You want your lively ideas and sparkling personality to be appreciated, so maybe your partner isn’t expressing their affection openly enough, or you are just feeling stifled.

Don’t immediately invite the neighbours over for an orgy, but start socialising more as a couple. When your partner sees you being openly liked and admired by other people, they will probably take you back home for some one-on-one appreciation.

Sex with a faceless stranger

You’re craving physical pleasure with none of the usual relationship effort, like having to be thoughtful and considerate.

In real life, this behaviour would make you feel selfish, so your subconscious has created a person whose feelings you don’t need to worry about.

Try expressing your own needs more, and saying no to things you don’t like, and you’ll start saying “Yes, yes, YES” more in bed.

Doing it in your childhood home

This can indicate you are yearning for a more carefree time. But by dreaming about having sex on your old bunk-bed, you clearly still enjoy your new adult wisdom and confidence.

Try stripping your relationship back to basics. Go on relaxed dates with your long-term lover and don’t worry so much about the future.

Single? Look for down-to-earth new partners who share your fun-loving values.

Sex in an exotic location

Sun, sea, sand and your subconscious could mean you’re stuck in a real-life sex rut. You want to shake things up, but don’t know how.

The more exotic the location, the more bored you are, but also the trickier you feel it would be to change.

The good news is, you don’t need to get away from it all in order to revolutionise your sex life.

Simply snogging for 15 minutes or banning your over-used positions can make you feel like you’ve revamped everything.

Bedding someone of a gender you are not usually attracted to

Don’t overthink this one — it doesn’t mean your sexuality is a lie.

This can simply signify you are wanting more of whatever that gender represents to you.

For example, if you dream of making love with another woman, you might be craving more affection, emotional support, fun — or whatever you feel females bring to relationships.

If you usually prefer women but you dream about a man, you might be desiring more assertiveness and danger.

Dreaming about kinky bondage sex you would never usually be drawn to

The meaning of this scenario depends on the role you take in the dream.

If you are being tied up and dominated, then you might feel you are being repressed or held back in real life.

Is your partner acting selfishly at the moment, or are you putting your goals on hold while they pursue theirs? Start finding ways to fulfil your own ambitions.

If you are in control in the dream, then you are not letting your partner in emotionally.

Let your guard down; vulnerability helps you connect in your relationship.

Dreaming about having a mind-blowing orgasm

You might simply have climaxed as you slept, especially if it has been a while since you have had an orgasm.

You could also have been sleeping on your stomach, which was stimulating you or you might just find it easier to climax when you are asleep as you can let go completely.

This can be a sign your body is craving the release of an orgasm, so start making more moves on your partner or just find time for more solo fun.

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